While watching a certain morning television program, I discovered that a childhood memory personality turned out to be a VEGAN. Her name is Jackie and she is the co-host on Howard Stern. Sounds like a strange childhood personality, but its mainly because my mom listened to that radio program when she drove me to the school.
That revelation sparked me to go on the internet (Wikipedia) and find out other famous vegans. I was surprised by the amount of famous people and decided to post some of my personal favorite highlights.
Oh also, let it be known that I try to distance myself from the zanies over at PeTA. I do not like their advertising methods and various other ways of getting their crazy animals-before-humans agenda out there.
The best way to practice veganism is to make jokes. Right!?
Here it go:
Zaniest Vegan: Daryl Hannah.The first person may not be that much of a surprise to you if you know ANY info about Daryl Hannah. She is super crazy about the environment (chaining herself to a tree) and is also alll about the animals. I've selected her character Elle Driver and matched it with her secret agent name, California Mountain Snake. Hi-yo! Prettiest one-eyed vegan this side of the Yellow River.
Vegan that I Don't Really Know Why I Included On This List: Tobey Maguire, aka Spiderman.Not much to say about him as it was just something I did not know before. He fits the 'Conor-Oberst-esque' mold/mould. Spiders / tarantulas love him.
Greatest Childhood Icon Vegan: Dav Pilkey.I could not find any awesome photos of Dav Pilkey, so I used his books. Remember how fun they were?! Captain Underpants with those flippy things, the dog being all cute, the Dumb Bunnies doing silly things. Oh goodness. Brought joy to my first and second grade years. How neat!
Best Father/Daughter Vegans: Paul and Stella McCartney.
Paul's music and veganism make up for that horrible mistake he made with that cunt Heather Mills. Also, Stella designs vegan shoes for animal and couture lovers. Once she even did a thing for H&M that sold out within two hours. BFFs with Paltrow. Featured with them is an English Fox. Uh-dorable.
Weirdest/Curliest Vegan: Weird Al.This just goes to prove that Weird Al is the nicest guy in showbiz. I wish his show was still on television. I also wish 'Muppet Babies' was still on as well. Sighhh.
Biggest Vegan Shocker: Shania Twain!When you think country music and country music stars, you usually think the South, annoyance, and BBQs. But not for this Southern Belle! I paired her with a jackalope (those are still funny in the South right??). ***Edit: Because I rarely fact-check anything I write up, it turns out Shania Twain is not from the South at all but from the North, the wayyy North (Canada). So it is not as big as a shocker that she is vegan but still, a vegan country singer?? Sounds pretty nuts to me. I should put up a moose instead, but seriously, when is the last time someone referenced a jackalope? Exactly.***
Humblest Vegan: Lacie.Now, I may bring up or talk about veganism four or five times day but with this little lady, you would hardly even know! She's always been passionate about animals and is majoring in zoology (I donno, I stopped askng my friend's majors after the first week of school. I have no idea what anyone is doing). Whether
killing nurturing fish or playing with kitties, Lacie is the epitome of compassion. In fact, the first time I ever hung out with Lacie was a wake (lunch in J&H) followed by a funeral for her fish. It was magical.
Most Royal Vegan: Princess Diana.
Psych! But couldn't you see yourself reading that and being surprised for a minute and then saying to yourself "Oh, I could see that. It makes sense".
Since I like to think of "No Nasties" as (for the most part) free of bias and drama, I will present the other side of dietary lifestyles and showcase some famous non-vegans:
An old vampire that lives off the blood of younger, prettier victims. Unfortunately, Dina Lohan didn't make it into the picture, but the same can be said about Karl Lagerfeld.
An overrated, dead drug addict.
Emperor Caligula, Drusilla, and some other guy. Roman orgies are notoriously not vegan.
$$$
Unfortunately he hung out at the Korova MILK bar and not the Korova SOY MILK Bar.
Some lady brought all sorts of food the other day and Shepherd had a field day.
I do not think veganism was an accepted practice during the Northern Renaissance 1400-1600.
Rosie may have been HXC about veganism and women's lib while she studied at Smith and/or Wellesley, but this butch has given that shizz up and is all about BBQs and fondue ragers.
I hope you learned something today because I did not. It was Spring Fling and my classes were canceled. People passed out ALL over the place.
