Fête Up: Holiday Sweaters

Do you like my clever sloganeering? It's as though Nylon writes all my blog titles!

Hanukkah begins tomorrow and that means it is officially okay for Holiday Parties to begin (as decreed by the secret Israeli police).

As a thrower of several Holiday fiestas and an attendee of billions of festive get-togethers, I would like to drop helpful hints about Holiday parties throughout the course of this week.

Dressing appropriately is highly important to insuring everybody has a good time. Nobody wants to see your feet in the wintertime (or most time) so avoid flip flops. Also I don't know anyone who likes Uggs so don't encourage the fashionistas to snicker and scoff at you all night by showing up in your sueded mistakes.

Holiday Blunder: Last year, some friends and I went to someone's (way) older cousin's house for a Christmas gathering. It was pretty WASPy so it's safe to say it was a Christmas party. For some reason I thought it would be neat to wear my crazy AA hoodie (show on this fellow here) and black skinny jeans. Pairing those clothes with my height and age, I stood out prominently. Picture those posters and ads you see in American Eagle of what they imagine the perfect holiday party should be, and that's what it was. Fortunately the eggnog was flowing and I launched into a Spanish tirade that took me from the oddball out to the festive noel.

It is important to note that there is nothing wrong with standing out and being different! Right Judy Blume?!? But it is also important to note that there are times when its best not to stand out like a shiny gemstone in a pile of Ticonderoga pencils, such as: Vietnamese POW camps, most frat parties, the Westboro Baptist Church, etc. etc.

I'll have more tips and tricks for appropriate Holiday party-wear and other aspects of Holiday partying in the coming days, but for now, I'll leave you with Hannah's and I's planned festive apparel.

Classical Movie Trailer Parks

Don't let VH1 or the Save the Music Foundation fool you. Nobody listens to classical music anymore. I also sincerely doubt anyone can even play a classical musical instrumental instrument either. The public education system uses all those funds they receive from that "organization" to fund other things like... I don't know, HPV vaccinations and field hockey fields to keep their names in the paper.

High School bands?
Alicia Keys?
Violin solo talent shows?

Lies.

But do not worry.

A small, noble organization has taken upon itself to use classical music in an interesting way.

Yes, from the people who gave us 'Saving Private Ryan' and eating disorders, Hollywood has taken the symphonies and requiems and applied them to high-quality cinematic trailers.

Here are some highlights:

Elephant



Ah 'Elephant'. Better known as '81 Minutes of Walking Around a School'. The trailer features the well-known classical piece 'Fur Elise'. The troubled Columbine-esque antagonist plays this piece throughout the movie. I believe, much like 120 Days of Sodom or Mein Kampf, this movie gets flagged with the government when you rent it or something. So... be careful. Big Blockbuster is watching (what you rent).

Funny Games



The film snobs are up in arms about this movie! It's a shot by shot remake by the director of the original Austrian film 'Funny Games'. Fans do not know whether to hate it or love it. Either way, they will probably still assert that "they liked the original better when they saw it TEN YEARS AGO". I do not have an opinion since I have not seen the original. Props to Claire for being able to identify the song from the trailer. My favorite part is around 1:42 when the boy makes a silly face and the Michael Pitt makes a bang sound. When I saw this trailer in the theater I, like most other film fans, noticed the similarities to another movie favorite of mine. See if you can figure it out. HINT: It makes this list.

Battle Royale



Everyday that I sit in my Japanese class, this movie is all I think about. I also like to think about how long I would last in Battle Royale. Hopefully we'll never know. The film is set in a futuristic Japan where the kids are bad. So bad in fact, that every year a class is chosen from the country and all the kids are sent to an island where they have to kill each other. Sailor Moon, where are you?! If you're interested, you can watch the full movie here.

A Clockwork Orange



Ahhh yes. Remember when I really liked this movie? Good times. The trailer is great. It has that oh so important style-over-substance aspect. You do not get a nice understanding of the plot but rather a lovely case of the epilepsy.


What do all of these movies have in common? Artsy violence. The BEST kind of gore porn. Leading me to conclude that classical music is bad and should be banned from public schools, not encouraged.

Take a stand.

Keep music (and Beyonce Knowles) out of your children's elementary schools.

Coldie Oldies

Five songs to warm your toes during this cold, awful, terrible weather:

1. Christmas Time -- Vince Guaraldi

Best Christmas song EVER. Whether eating a butterscotch sundae (The Royal Tenenbaums) or making peppermint mochas (my life at the moment) this song is fantastic cold weather background music.

2. In the Cold Cold Night -- The White Stripes

For some reason this song makes it on to almost all of my iTunes playlists. Apart from 80's Dance Party and my HPV playlist which consists of Gravy Train and VIP.

3. The Chills -- Peter Bjorn and John

This song also made me think of coldness even in the summertime which is strange because the song is not even that brisk.

4. Who Loves the Sun -- The Velvet Underground

This was my ultimate favorite song for a really long time. Still is fantastic.

5. Two Way Monologue -- Sondre Lerche

This song is on the list because the first time I heard it was right after a big snowstorm on campus. Dani just played song after song for me while we were snowed in my room.

It's a Sunshine Day (Haircut)

Much to the dismay of my family and friends, my hair had not been cut since mid-August. All that changed today when I went to the most fantastic place ever and got the best haircut ever. I'm sure pictures will leak from various sources at some point, but for now it must all remain a mystery.

This is not an exhilarating post because tonight is not an exhilarating evening.

I really love the Brady Bunch though. No fake. I used to wake up at 10:00 a.m. in the summertime so I could catch an episode and then go out for the day. It was the real deal.

Coffee Shopping: Lehigh Valley

Did you know that Voltaire drank more than fifty cups of coffee a day??

It's true.

So do not worry about OD-ing on America's most popular drug (legal or illegal, take THAT meth-heads).

As some of you may know, I recently got a job at well-known chain of coffee shops. Today I had to make over 8 different types of drinks as part of my training and had to drink over half of them. That's a lot of caffeine AND a lot of calories. By the end of my shift I was so wired and buzzed, I made it back to campus from center city in under ten minutes. Also, I'm shaking a lot. Woo!

Before my imminent caffeine crash, I would like to share with you, my lovely readers (by the way is that a new shirt? It's looks fantastic. Oh, you've had it for a couple months now? Well I think you should wear it more often) some of my most favorite places to get coffee in the good ol' Lehigh Valley. I would do Philadelphia but I still have one more coffee house to go to before I can order and rank them all.

Here it go:

Best coffee for Thespians and their Families: Hava Java

Located in Allentown's "West End", Hava Java makes for a nice little stop before or after a show at the civic theatre and/or its movie annex. I have only been there a few times after catching a movie at the annex BUT the coffee was really good. I cannot recall too much about it except there were almost always people sitting outside at night when I drove past it. The floor is also pretty neat! Black and white tile from what I remember. I JUST read on their MySpace that they have changed hands but everything will pretty much be the same. Good news for you regulars! Also, if you ever need eyeglasses, a family friend owns a neat little shop right next door. Go in and tell them Andrew sent you.

Best Coffee if you like Hot Topic / You Have a Time Machine that Goes Back Three Years Ago: King Koffee

Okay, maybe this title is a little jaded and bias, but oh well, such is bloggery. Back in the tenth and eleventh grade this Emmaus coffee shop used to be the cat's meow. Every Friday (and most Saturdays) practically everyone that mattered went. I cannot really remember what we did since we rarely bought drinks. Card games, laughter, sitting outside, sitting on couches, etc. etc. Sometimes they would even have shows and that was always an experience. Eventually the older kids stopped going and a younger generation took their spot (enter: Nightmare Before Christmas hoodies, safety pins, and even mesh shorts). Food and drink-wise, they have a vast selection. It's still a pretty nice place to go I'm sure... ya know, if you avoid the weekends. Also open-mic night was always interesting. Check it out sometime.

Best Coffee if you are a Thirty-Something: Perk Cafe

Oh Perk. You are a mystery! In the beginning the small coffee house closed before 1:00p.m. and sponsored one of the High School powder puff teams. Now it seems to be open later and thriving! I have been a few times and always feel out of place as one of the younger customers in the place. Fantastic coffee and other little treats sure to delight those born in the 70's and earlier! The place is always jumping on Sundays and makes for a fantastic stop post-Emmaus Farmer's Market.

Best Place to get Coffee All Night: Dunkin Donuts (The one by Carrabba's!)

Oh gosh. I don't care what anyone says, double D is the best chain coffee house around. It's such a good price too. Also, they call me "chief" when I go in so that's neat. A downside is that there are huge posters of Rachel Ray everywhere. They're open 24 hours so whether you're living it up at the NERD center or bored, stop in.


Best Coffee Overall: Mas Cafe

I discovered this gem far too late in the summer! I mentioned it in an earlier post that urged supporting local businesses and I'll do it again. I never had anything else there but seriously, if you like coffee, GO. The owners are young newlyweds who always wanted to open a coffee shop and went all over the place getting ideas for theirs and finally opened shop. Free wi-fi too. Woop.



Those are a few of my favorite coffee places but there are probably some more out there in the Valley (such as Bethlehem, but that's a bit of a drive). Diners are always a good place for coffee too and the Lord Jesus Above Us knows that there are piles of diners in the valley. Some are mean and only provide one free refill. Do not give these places your money.

Okay! So look forward towards more coffee updates. Also, this weekend should hopefully be nuts and I'll stuff to tell you alllll about.