Let me just say that I cannot stand Heidi Montag or her smarmy boyfriend Spencer Pratt, who's name befits him so very much. Also, let me point out that I have never seen "Laguna Beach" or "The Hills". All I know is the basic premise of both shows (rich bitches I don't care about similar to the ones I didn't care about when I was in High School and their lives) and I also know that for whatever reason, Heidi, Spencer, and a slew of other rich kids have been making appearances on talk shows like the View and David Letterman promoting the fact that they do not really do anything.
To throw off their image of just being good-looking and MTV's knowledge that idiots will watch them be pretty and whine, Heidi and the gang decide to do their own wittle projects. Everyone picks the same projects: Acting (they've honed their skills on their reality shows), Music (they own mp3 players), or Fashion (they are able to assemble an outfit out of the clothes featured on a Forever 21 mannequin). No one ever decides to be a Chef (they like the eating / not-eating aspect of food), Painter (sadly, painting skills cannot be acquired on Rodeo Drive), or Veterinarian (Typically no fame / self-promotion involved, but lots of cuddly animals!! awr).
Heidi used her exposure to pursue not only singing (watch out Billie Holiday, I think you may have competition) , but she also decided to delve into FASHION. Finally, someone is bringing their skill of matching black with grey and halter tops with skinny jeans to the fashion world.
It seems I missed her first line (must have been far too underground and cult for me to enjoy) but thankfully I have photos of her NEWEST collection, enjoy!
To throw off their image of just being good-looking and MTV's knowledge that idiots will watch them be pretty and whine, Heidi and the gang decide to do their own wittle projects. Everyone picks the same projects: Acting (they've honed their skills on their reality shows), Music (they own mp3 players), or Fashion (they are able to assemble an outfit out of the clothes featured on a Forever 21 mannequin). No one ever decides to be a Chef (they like the eating / not-eating aspect of food), Painter (sadly, painting skills cannot be acquired on Rodeo Drive), or Veterinarian (Typically no fame / self-promotion involved, but lots of cuddly animals!! awr).
Heidi used her exposure to pursue not only singing (watch out Billie Holiday, I think you may have competition) , but she also decided to delve into FASHION. Finally, someone is bringing their skill of matching black with grey and halter tops with skinny jeans to the fashion world.
It seems I missed her first line (must have been far too underground and cult for me to enjoy) but thankfully I have photos of her NEWEST collection, enjoy!
Precious metals indeed! Nothing says rock star like a big tattooed emblem. I'm going to wear this to the club evurrytime they pay me $1,000+ to be there.
I think she got her line mixed up with Hot Topic's newest arrival.
Trouser jeans must mean they are just the bad parts of trousers put into denim. Also, what are the right details for summer nights? Do they have graham cracker, marshmallow, and choco bar containers to make perfect s'mores?
Won't be able to hide = no fatties. How fun that all you need to do is Febreeze your dress with ugly jewelry and you're ready to go from shopping to drinking to clubbing.
Oh yes, those FREEZING nights in the Hills. Also, if you know me, you know I love me some tight black pants, but blargh at low-rise. I mean, look at the space between her hoodie and jeans, her vagina is practically acting as her belly button there.
Finally, a designer brave enough to make a pintack.
This reminds me of one of those Halloween costumes that's just a slutty version of an occupation. Like this would be... slutty power-lesbian CEO.
Mmm, this is very "Rock of Love" aka 40 year old white trash groupie.
So there you have it. The "Heidiwood" collection. Heidi Montag will have people asking "Hedi Slimane who?"
Just kidding.
Just kidding.
2 comments:
corset hoody? maybe those are just two things that should never meet.
BUT LOOK AT HER HAIR!! It's like a lion's mane of divalisciousness.
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