I Just Wanna Have Fun AdBusters

Stop being so cross about my generation having fun and wearing zany clothes in articles like THIS and start telling me more about the impending Chinese global rule.

Why are you not Watching the View right now?

Shit's going down.

Do old ladies bickering make you uncomfortables?

Dear Readers,

It's the weekend again, and you know what that means...

Time for me to travel by car, train, Bieber bus, subway, and my dad's Volkswagen van all over the Tri-State area.

This weekend's trip covers the following:

Philly, Brklyn / Mnhttn, Japanese consulate, anddd even a little stop in Delaware to visit my dad.

It's gonna be nuts! Unfortunately for you, I have no idea when I'm going to return and this week sucked as far as me updating soooo I had to do this, but I'm gonna have to give you silly scheduled posting for awhile.

Favorite Salvador Dali Painting

So simple!
So controversial!

Just like meeee.

Making a Racquet

Oh freshmen year!

For Yasmin's Mom

It was a Queer, Sultry Summer...

...the summer they electrocuted the Rosenbergs and I didn't know what I was doing in New York.

Actually, I did know exactly what I was doing in NY:

Having a grand old time!

I just got back today around 8 p.m.

Also, those commie bastards were fried years ago.

Tokyo Slumbers

My room in Tokyo. Notice the kitchenette!

The Impossible Made Possible: Girl Talk

Oh sweet sufferings! What better way to enjoy a mash-up of your favorite songs than in video form!

I cannot wait to see the rest of the tracks done like thisss.

If everything went to plan (I'm writing this scheduled post on Thursday), I should be recovering from a hang-over after Lacie's party. Still more NY time ahead of me! Woop.

Reunited

I finally get to see these three ladies this weekend!

I'm going to New York again this weekend for Lacie's big move-in party in Brooklyn. Then I'm visiting another friend I haven't seen in awhile on Saturday, followed by Jen and Joann coming up to NY on Sunday for the day.

Woop!

Enjoy your weekend.

Allentown to Hollywood

No, this post is not about how some talent scout noticed my lollipop sucking skills and now I'm being whisked off to Hollywood to star in porn, it's actually about Amanda Seyfried.

Mmm wood paneling.

Anyways, Amanda was on the View today and it reminded me how much I just think she's tops. She was really good in Mean Girls and now she's co-starring with Meryl Streep in Mamma Mia!.

Another reason I really like her is the fact that she's from Allentown and graduated from a high school just down the road! She's also sort of a friend of friends and even dated a friend of a friend. Less than six degrees of separation, woop woop.

She's definitely going to be an actress to keep an eye on.

Stichcraft and Bitchery

What a crafty summer!

Shorts to cupcakes to bags to a myriad of things.

If only I would have spent more time filling out LOAN APPLICATIONS.

Chocolate with chocolate fudge icing, chocolate with peanut butter mousse, strawberry shortcakes, and vanilla cupcakes with Thai coconut glaze. Vegan organic HEAVEN.

These herringbone trouser shorts used to be just regular herringbone trousers with terrible bootcut legs. A few snips and a whirl of the sewing machine and I'm lookin' smart and feelin' good or something.

And my bag that I use to haul my work clothes or sometimes when I go places. It's made out of Ikea fabric that went on sale two days after I bought it. Sick!

Tomorrow I leave to go to New York for the weekend and you know what that means... scheduled posting!

MTV Promo and American Apparel BJ

Remember that old MTV commercial where a girl is working at a bar and she looks super busy and she's getting super sleazed on? And then later she goes home, counts all her tip money, looks extremely content and does ballet because she just got into dance school or something?

That's basically how I feel after an eleven hour shift. I sit on my floor and count my tips and smile and rub my sore legs in bliss. The only difference is I don't (often) get sleazed on nor am I saving up to go to ballet school because I am not limber enough to touch my toes.

But you get the idea.

Also, new provocative ad from American Apparel.

Oh la la, quelle trash / artsy porn.

Also, I sold my first dozen cupcakes today! Wooooop.

She's Soooo Rock Star

Let me just say that I cannot stand Heidi Montag or her smarmy boyfriend Spencer Pratt, who's name befits him so very much. Also, let me point out that I have never seen "Laguna Beach" or "The Hills". All I know is the basic premise of both shows (rich bitches I don't care about similar to the ones I didn't care about when I was in High School and their lives) and I also know that for whatever reason, Heidi, Spencer, and a slew of other rich kids have been making appearances on talk shows like the View and David Letterman promoting the fact that they do not really do anything.

To throw off their image of just being good-looking and MTV's knowledge that idiots will watch them be pretty and whine, Heidi and the gang decide to do their own wittle projects. Everyone picks the same projects: Acting (they've honed their skills on their reality shows), Music (they own mp3 players), or Fashion (they are able to assemble an outfit out of the clothes featured on a Forever 21 mannequin). No one ever decides to be a Chef (they like the eating / not-eating aspect of food), Painter (sadly, painting skills cannot be acquired on Rodeo Drive), or Veterinarian (Typically no fame / self-promotion involved, but lots of cuddly animals!! awr).

Heidi used her exposure to pursue not only singing (watch out Billie Holiday, I think you may have competition) , but she also decided to delve into FASHION. Finally, someone is bringing their skill of matching black with grey and halter tops with skinny jeans to the fashion world.

It seems I missed her first line (must have been far too underground and cult for me to enjoy) but thankfully I have photos of her NEWEST collection, enjoy!

Precious metals indeed! Nothing says rock star like a big tattooed emblem. I'm going to wear this to the club evurrytime they pay me $1,000+ to be there.

I think she got her line mixed up with Hot Topic's newest arrival.

Trouser jeans must mean they are just the bad parts of trousers put into denim. Also, what are the right details for summer nights? Do they have graham cracker, marshmallow, and choco bar containers to make perfect s'mores?

Won't be able to hide = no fatties. How fun that all you need to do is Febreeze your dress with ugly jewelry and you're ready to go from shopping to drinking to clubbing.

Oh yes, those FREEZING nights in the Hills. Also, if you know me, you know I love me some tight black pants, but blargh at low-rise. I mean, look at the space between her hoodie and jeans, her vagina is practically acting as her belly button there.

Finally, a designer brave enough to make a pintack.

This reminds me of one of those Halloween costumes that's just a slutty version of an occupation. Like this would be... slutty power-lesbian CEO.

Mmm, this is very "Rock of Love" aka 40 year old white trash groupie.

So there you have it. The "Heidiwood" collection. Heidi Montag will have people asking "Hedi Slimane who?"

Just kidding.

Hitchcock Blonde: Ingrid Bergman

I was going to title this "My Favorite Hitchcock Blonde" but while currently watching Eva Saint Marie's performance in "North By Northwest" the title is now being fought between the two. And also maybe Tippi Hedren. Or Kim Novak. Alls I know is, Hitchcock picked some highly-praisable actresses!

One of my favorite Hitchcock films is "Notorious". It's one of his earlier films, but has all the elements of his infamous style.

The film was on the other day RIGHT after "All About Eve". It was a Turner Classic Wet Dream.

Anywho, here is a really adorable video of Ingrid Bergman, Alfred Hitchcock, and a little key you may remember if you saw "Notorious".

Connecticut Tension and the Richest People in the World

Hello.

I am a shower, a four mile run, straight hair, and several hours and miles past my trip to the North, aka Connecticut.

Yasmin and I are currently trying to process the whole thing. We both feel a bit weird and I cannot come to a conclusion as to how I feel about the whole damn thing.

In my summary of the trip, I will try to remain neutral in my commentary so as to just give ya the facts and not skew the entire thing for you, the beloved readers.

Who: Me, Jen, Yasmin, Max, Brendan, Ans, Kurtz, and Bubba

What: A bizarre road / camping / sk8 / beach trip

Where: Connecticut

When: Friday July 11th - Sunday July 13th

How: With many arguments, pissing, moaning and some jokes.

Friday we left at a little after noon and began our journey. Stopped in Stamford to skate / sit on a bench with Jen and Yasmin and listen to some dumb girl talk to Kurtz. A memorable quote from a boy at the skatepark was "You guys see Zohan yet?" or something to that effect. We promptly left after that.

We stopped at a falafel place that was reallll decent. The girl working the counter was probably the prettiest girl I have seen in awhile. We carried on and eventually reached our campground.

It was really bizarre / trashy. We set up the tent and then just sat around. A very special 'captain' helped take the stress of the day off of me and then I went to sleep.

Others went swimming and then they were yelled at for being too loud.

The next morning we packed up and shipped out. Our next destination was the beach which was pretty much the only part of the trip I enjoyed.

Nothing like laying in the sun for hours and gettin' all sweaty and then jumping in the water!

Later, our friends befriended this bizarre kid who lived in the top of this old Victorian house and it reminded me of a squat house. He won the lottery and crashed the Cadillac that he bought with the money. He skates though.

He tried leading us to a beach but it was basically five billion miles away and we had to cross through an ethnic park filled with fishermen. We headed back to the beach where I resorted to texting and eating graham crackers.

We tried sleeping on the beach but we were kicked out so we had to traverse the beach and sleep on private property. I woke up in the middle of the night and panicked because I forgot where I was. So fun for the kids.

Also, I had to use a portapotty and it was in a huge football stadium of a parking lot at 2 a.m. and all I could think about was something 'biting me' and /or a car smashing through the disgusting box.

Today we woke up at 5 a.m. on the beach which was mad scenic, followed by diner food which was immediately followed by arguing about more skating.

In the end, I got home around noon. I ran four miles to shake off all stressors and and anger, showered, and then the entire family came over for a party.

THE END (thank goodness [just kidding, I love all my friends, but I do think everyone was angry at one point])



Now for photos: